The Nolan Crush Memorial Post Dump and Lolcow Thread

[God's Strongest Dragoon]

Update - Nolan has deleted the post about his therapy. And replaced it with this post.

>misses half of the anniversary relay stream
>starts crying like a child
>tries to superchat to feel included but finds out his dad locked his card because he's been spending like crazy
>brother insults him for being a sperg
>autistically screams and tries to attack his brother with his noodle arms
>brother pushes him back and then hits him
This is the funniest shit I've seen in a while. He really does go ballistic and resorts to violence when he's upset, no wonder he hated us alluding to him being a violent abuser. It's a good thing he's a frail little fag.

 

[reinigen]

>tries to superchat to feel included but finds out his dad locked his card because he's been spending like crazy

Hey actually DID manage to get a superchat in! Looks like a half hour between when he tried and the sob story about his dad, so I wonder if his insistence to simp even when he has no money made his pops lock down his shit after the psych visit.

 

[GOD'S STRONGEST BUILDERBEAR]

people were sympathetic

for the dog, not the tard, evidently.

 

[Johnny Jambalaya]

His dad should just let him have his own card and leave him to do whatever he wants. He may not remember those superchats in a couple years but Discover will.

 

[El Rrata]

Hey actually DID manage to get a superchat in! Looks like a half hour between when he tried and the sob story about his dad, so I wonder if his insistence to simp even when he has no money made his pops lock down his shit after the psych visit.

And it won't even get read because it was only a $5 dono. Sad.

 

[reinigen]

His dad should just let him have his own card and leave him to do whatever he wants. He may not remember those superchats in a couple years but Discover will.

I can't even being to imagine how much debt an unchecked Nolan would rack up. I imagine it'd be the same situation as Chris where it'd all be spent on toys and superchats and maybe a run to McDonalds.

 

[BlueSharkTV]

So the sperg is throwing money that's not even his away for 5 seconds of attention, i don't know if his family can say he was stealing from them when they decide to kick him out and any legal entity tells them he's too retarded to live on his own. i don't think he's too far from becoming a cow at the rate this is going.

 

[Nenélove]

His dad should just let him have his own card and leave him to do whatever he wants. He may not remember those superchats in a couple years but Discover will.

Probably not a good idea, Idk US legislation but I can see a situation where Nolan is declared incompetent and the debt defaults to his guardians or some shit.

 

[Seth]

Hey actually DID manage to get a superchat in! Looks like a half hour between when he tried and the sob story about his dad, so I wonder if his insistence to simp even when he has no money made his pops lock down his shit after the psych visit.

Who the fuck reacts like that for not being able to send a 5$ sc that wont be read!? Man i wish i could kick him in the face holy shit

 

[100% not Hakka]

Summary of the latest happenings in the Nolanverse:

my therapist won't give me free asspats

my dad won't let me bankrupt the family

my brother won't let me assault him with impunity

I couldn't watch random stream #6529 live

German people refuse to listen to my correct political opinions about a country I do not live in and have nothing to do with

I miss my sister (who is dead btw). I would very much like it if she weren't dead. Did I mention she's dead and that I am most affected? because she is, in fact, dead, and that makes me very sad.

 

[GOD'S STRONGEST BUILDERBEAR]

I miss my sister, she couldn't fight back...

 

[RestlessRain]

Here's a thought - when Nolan's parents die or aren't able to take care of Nolan any more, the one left with the thankless job of tardwrangling Nolan will be his brother, who hates him. And if he decides to take up this job, possibly out of some sense of loyalty towards his parents, his only reward will be to be screeched at and punched whenever Nolan doesn't get his way. And I don't see him taking up that role, given what Nolan has said about his brother.

tl;dr: Good luck when your parents die, Nolan. You're going to need it.

 

[Punished Anime Discusser]

View attachment 45092I miss my sister, she couldn't fight back...

Listen man, he wasted the Xfactor and level 3 on a character with basically no health, and now he has no meter to make a comeback, and Nolan's Dad as an anchor character is like SSS-tier, Nolan's Brother is a godlike zoner, and Nolan has no mobility to get in through the 6 frame Slight Nudge, and "Why The Fuck Are You Fisting The Icecream"'s hitbox is retarded.

 

[reinigen]

Here's a thought - when Nolan's parents die or aren't able to take care of Nolan any more, the one left with the thankless job of tardwrangling Nolan will be his brother, who hates him. And if he decides to take up this job, possibly out of some sense of loyalty towards his parents, his only reward will be to be screeched at and punched whenever Nolan doesn't get his way. And I don't see him taking up that role, given what Nolan has said about his brother.

tl;dr: Good luck when your parents die, Nolan. You're going to need it.

Depending how mentally incompetent he's tested as being, he could be made a ward of the state of Ohio. But I dunno what their levels for that kinda thing are.

 

[reinigen]

Nolan has taken refuge in Chinese fancords. He is ESL LMAOing

 

[100% not Hakka]

Nolan has taken refuge in Chinese fancords. He is ESL LMAOing
View attachment 45139
View attachment 45140

Wait - translate? to a chinese server? I doubt Nolan is aware of this, but knowing the language you're translating into and from is sort of a requirement to translate anything. Or does he "know" Chinese like he "knows" German?

 

[IdenticalPlateaus]

Or does he "know" Chinese like he "knows" German?

I wouldn't be surprised if people not understanding him is the only thing stopping him from getting banned there too.

 

[CalciumAnimal]

Hey actually DID manage to get a superchat in! Looks like a half hour between when he tried and the sob story about his dad, so I wonder if his insistence to simp even when he has no money made his pops lock down his shit after the psych visit.

Nolan being a tard aside would not surprise me if the bank is gating his card for "suspicious payments" and hes just blaming his family. they did that to be a few times when im buying stuff through steam or gog or humblebundle.

 

[Nenélove]

Nolan has taken refuge in Chinese fancords. He is ESL LMAOing
View attachment 45139View attachment 45140

I love the CCP!
Taiwan is not a real country!
Where are my 50 cents per post?!
They took away my social credit...
I have been sent to a re-ed camp in Xinjiang

Mfw cryposting becomes a new asylum meme...

 

[100% not Hakka]

View attachment 45144I love the CCP!
View attachment 45144Taiwan is not a real country!
View attachment 45144Where are my 50 cents per post?!
View attachment 45144They took away my social credit...
View attachment 45144I have been sent to a re-ed camp in Xinjiang

Mfw cryposting becomes a new asylum meme...

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