The Nolan Crush Memorial Post Dump and Lolcow Thread

[ex_lurker]

He sounds exactly like what you would expect too.

How old is Nolan again? He sounds like he's still going through puberty

 

[Any Name You Wish]

He sounds exactly like what you would expect too.

Christ on a cross. He really does. Dude sounds like Patrick Star with a head cold. I'd say I hope he never reproduces but, to be honest, I can't see anyone willingly procreating with this kid.

And Nolan, if you are reading this, which I'm sure you are, you have no one to blame for this entire situation except yourself. People have tried to give you genuinely good advice, and tried to help you. Sure, maybe it was because 'oh he's a retard but he's OUR retard' or something unflattering like that, but that's besides the point. You repaid these people by spitting in their faces and acting like a total narcissist, which by the way I take one look at you and you ain't got jack shit to be narcissistic over. One day, you're going to wake up and realize you have nothing and no one, and I want you to know that when that happens it's all because of your own undeserved ego. Get some serious help for the mental issues you very clearly have, while you still can.

 

[Seth]

How old is Nolan again? He sounds like he's still going through puberty

He turned 23 in June or July cant remember the date.

 

[fortnitesmasherX]

He turned 23 in June or July cant remember the date.

June 19th 2001. I have a great memory for dates.

 

[niggaphil]

June 19th 2001. I have a great memory for dates.

A better superpower than Nolan who could describe the unflushed toilet bowl in FHD detail

 

[Aquatic Novellite]

Jesus fucking christ. I only lurk and casually follow, and I mostly just shook my head at his dumbass, but this is my first time seeing him. Motherfucker looks like Danny Tanner if he had Downs.

You really have to appreciate this picture. It's taken from crotch height, the top of the crotch visible. He's looking down at the observer, smiling expectantly. He's holding a pony plush in one hand, while the other is reaching down, holding the viewer's chin. Central to the picture is his "Nolan" name tag, behind which an evil pony is looking at the viewer, its teeth bared, an evil smile forming on its long face.

You could put this picture up in a photography contest about sexual assault and basically be guaranteed first place.

 

[fortnitesmasherX]

You really have to appreciate this picture. It's taken from crotch height, the top of the crotch visible. He's looking down at the observer, smiling expectantly. He's holding a pony plush in one hand, while the other is reaching down, holding the viewer's chin. Central to the picture is his "Nolan" name tag, behind which an evil pony is looking at the viewer, its teeth bared, an evil smile forming on its long face.

You could put this picture up in a photography contest about sexual assault and basically be guaranteed first place.

Yeah, Nolan's pretty cool like that.

 

[Tamavitch]

You guys need to stop this. My sides can only take so much.

 

[Latte'Ninba]

Nothing, the coward removed it

View attachment 80398

Crush 🔱🇵🇸 on X: "I had removed the privacy complaint in the past Out of fear I will not be intimidated into silence If these fuckers do the same thing in response to this outside of their own site again. I’ll report that too I’ve dealt with people li

ghostarchive.org

The reason he retracted it is because he know he has no case and Proctor can counter him easily and malicious use of the privacy concern will insta nuke your account

Spoiler: You wanna be scared of us? Alright I got you

Ooga booga!

I gotta say this is a much funnier escalation than I was expecting. It's not major mind you, just so fucking stupid I really didn't account for it as a possibility. Since you like throwing information everywhere anyway, I would like to hear about the "people like us" you had to deal with. Fair warning though, most people aren't going to consider someone asking "Why are you so weird and noisy/spammy" as being a personal attack, and that's still more than we bothered to do. Doesn't count if they asked and you called them an asshole or got aggressive in the reply.
Friendly reminder we have literally nothing to do with all your discord bans, all your forum bans, your youtube shadowbans, nor any hissy fit you got up to on any of those or twitter. Once again take even a NANOSECOND to consider this is a you problem. (You won't) Being an egomaniacal narcissist doesn't allow that thought.


And yes, I already know that you've got nothing regarding "dealing with people like us." Largely in part because you only have to "deal with us" as much as you read the thread lol. I'm just very curious to see what type of people we are and who we get compared to.

 

[Takodachi]

At this point I am convinced this retard has an humiliation fetish.

 

[niggaphil]

Nolan continues to take another L after he failed to strike down our Femboi:

DeepL translation:
Got banned from another Chinese server, I don't understand, at all, what happened! I just did the live reaction, which is my usual normal behavior. I'm about to cry. I didn't do anything and I still got banned. I'm starting to get extremely paranoid and feel very insecure. If I could get banned without any reason or explanation, what else could happen? Sent a message to the admins of the server, but I'll be lucky if I get a reply, let alone an unban. Cry can I get a hug?

Thank you. I just don't understand? Why I can't feel safe anywhere.

Nolan, has you think of striking down these Chink servers or call police because they make you feeling unsafe?

 

[fortnitesmasherX]

I just did the live reaction, which is my usual normal behavior.

Guys, he figured it out. He finally understands why no one likes him.

 

[niggaphil]

Guys, he figured it out. He finally understands why no one likes him.

 

[IdenticalPlateaus]

I'm starting to get extremely paranoid and feel very insecure.

This is the best thing to happen to him in a long time.

If I could get banned without any reason or explanation, what else could happen?

 

[fortnitesmasherX]

View attachment 80448

How'd you get this picture of him What the fuck.

 

[Latte'Ninba]

Nolan continues to take another L after he failed to strike down our Femboi:

View attachment 80437

DeepL translation:
Got banned from another Chinese server, I don't understand, at all, what happened! I just did the live reaction, which is my usual normal behavior. I'm about to cry. I didn't do anything and I still got banned. I'm starting to get extremely paranoid and feel very insecure. If I could get banned without any reason or explanation, what else could happen? Sent a message to the admins of the server, but I'll be lucky if I get a reply, let alone an unban. Cry can I get a hug?

Thank you. I just don't understand? Why I can't feel safe anywhere.

Nolan, has you think of striking down these Chink servers or call police because they make you feeling unsafe?

How many levels of "feeling extremely paranoid and insecure" are there? Because I'm pretty sure this is like the 5th time he's said that after getting banned. And nothing's changed.
"This is my usual normal behavior" Spoiler alert: Getting banned all the time is ALSO normal for you. MAYHAPS, just MIGHT it be possible, is there PERCHANCE the SLIGHTEST bit of a concept that... your usual way of acting might be why you usually get banned?

"If I could get banned what else could happen?" Nothing. You aren't "the main character." You get banned because your inane bullshit is so spammy and tiresome they're tired of dealing with it. They forget you exist after their next nap. You aren't the cool protagonist guy everyone in class adores and looks really detailed as a cool misfit. You're one of the barely penciled in retarded characters in the background that was clearly a filler creature. You don't even have 5% of the quality of the book that's color is off because someone is going to interact with it. You don't even GET animation. The main character gives some gay speech and you're so irrelevant you don't even react to it.

You can't "feel safe" anywhere because you assume life is online and everything revolves on that. Get off the damn computer. I would say you would find out very quickly that chat bans aren't actual problems, except you've spent years bitching about "problems" that only get in the way of your streams. Family, meds, health, pets, etc. Yet still don't take them seriously. Bans are the end of the world and feel awful, but another fit from family about stuff that actively affects them, yourself and possibly even others? "Shut up you idiots don't talk to me. Stupid egomaniacs! Digital *hugs*?"
You know you could get actual hugs from people in real life right? Or you normally would if you stopped pissing them off all the time being an arrogant asshole.
<--- Yes I know --->

 

[tgmslc]

You can't "feel safe" anywhere because you assume life is online and everything revolves on that. Get off the damn computer. I would say you would find out very quickly that chat bans aren't actual problems, except you've spent years bitching about "problems" that only get in the way of your streams.

Reminds me of a great burn I saw once:

 

[IdenticalPlateaus]

How many levels of "feeling extremely paranoid and insecure" are there? Because I'm pretty sure this is like the 5th time he's said that after getting banned. And nothing's changed.

There aren't really 'levels', It's more of a circle. It goes:
- Breaks rules / etiquette
- Receives negative response
- Responds with aggression, this can last a while until he realises it isn't working
LOOP HERE if the people he is interacting with don't have any power over him
- Otherwise he pussies out and apologises
- If this doesn't work he starts a 'woe is me' pity party
- If this doesn't work he tries to forcibly move along with new topics or other distractions
- Finally avoidance and moving somewhere else to *Cries* and try obtain validation in the form of 'Hugs?'
LOOP HERE

I think Nolan is a good example of what separates a Lolcow from a garden variety retard. If he was just a idiot then he would break this pattern of behaviour, constant negative feedback would eventually train him out of some of his trouble seeking habits. There would at least be some kind of change. But because he is an idiot and an extreme narcissist, he isn't capable of learning from mistakes. The only hope he has of any growth would be by force and even then there is a good chance it doesn't work because of his persecution complex.

 

[fortnitesmasherX]

There aren't really 'levels', It's more of a circle. It goes:
- Breaks rules / etiquette
- Receives negative response
- Responds with aggression, this can last a while until he realises it isn't working
LOOP HERE if the people he is interacting with don't have any power over him
- Otherwise he pussies out and apologises
- If this doesn't work he starts a 'woe is me' pity party
- If this doesn't work he tries to forcibly move along with new topics or other distractions
- Finally avoidance and moving somewhere else to *Cries* and try obtain validation in the form of 'Hugs?'
LOOP HERE

I think Nolan is a good example of what separates a Lolcow from a garden variety retard. If he was just a idiot then he would break this pattern of behaviour, constant negative feedback would eventually train out of some of his trouble seeking habits. There would at least be some kind of change. But because he is an idiot and an extreme narcissist, he isn't capable of learning from mistakes. The only hope he has of any growth would be by force and even then there is a good chance it doesn't work because of his persecution complex.

This cycle is going to last indefinitely until either his parents die or send him to a facility.

 

[CalciumAnimal]

How'd you get this picture of him What the fuck.

He probably posted it himself.