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The Nolan Crush Memorial Post Dump and Lolcow Thread

God's Strongest Dragoon

Well-known member
Joined:  Mar 20, 2023
After mlp ofcourse. Vtubing demands his full attention, but ponies and faggotry around them helped to make him into who he is
100%. He receives pushback everywhere he goes in the vtubing community but the mlp community enables and encourages his retarded behavior.
 

CalciumAnimal

Drink Milk
Joined:  Feb 24, 2023
Scoots is a hard one to figure out. I should know, I've tried.
My best guess is "Hopeless optimism" or something along those lines. I tend to butt heads with the optimistic, "glass-half full" kind of forum members more than anyone so that's my guess.
still on my scoots is the anointed saint of the sick and autistic theory.
I've argued that his Dad should just remove his access to the internet entirely for at least a week so he can detox from that because he's clearly delusional, especially about the world. However I worry that the brainrot is already too deep and doing that might just trigger a stage 5 chimpout where he'd do something violent.
give ita month or two if it will take a week for him to actually stop whining about his lost access.also i suspect his dad does but cant be assed to actually enforce it that long.
 

God's Strongest Dragoon

Well-known member
Joined:  Mar 20, 2023
i suspect his dad does but cant be assed to actually enforce it that long.
From what I've noticed is that Nolan plays the, "You can't permanently lock me out of the internet, I need it for school/finding a job!" and then he doesn't do that and proceeds to screech online all day long.
 

PassiveUnaggressive

Well-known member
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 9, 2022
What is Nolan looking at?
Funniest answer gets Mexican's eternal approval, a charm which grants +100 charisma when speaking spanish and +20% health when consuming any foods which contain corn or chilis.
His sister is going ring grudge on him from the computer
 

Topo Chico

Well-known member
Joined:  Apr 1, 2023
The King has swapped out his pinned tweet, an ode to dear 'ol sister (RIP)... for a post about Nijisanji drama. Damn he really loved her huh?

He WILL defend their honor

He takes this position because he finds it hot

Also interestingly, Lexi is still around, and German? This nigga is an onion with so many layers.
 

GOD'S STRONGEST BUILDERBEAR

"Shut up, Dazzle. I will clip your balls" -SB
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 12, 2022
and German? This nigga is an onion with so many layers.
Dude was sperging about german politics on german half a year ago, I think. Mind you, he doesnt know german (uses google translate), hes barely part german and he lives as far away from germany as possible.
 

Hff201

Pippa Fan, Failed Normalfriend
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 13, 2022
Nolan calling someone else a "retard awful brother" is either the most hilariously oblivious lack of self-awareness in history, or it's the perfect comedic payoff whoever is running the simulation has been sitting on for years.
 

Aquatic Novellite

Freshwater Shiorin
Early Adopter
Joined:  Oct 10, 2022
Also interestingly, Lexi is still around, and German? This nigga is an onion with so many layers.

If my questionable school German and twitter translate are to be trusted, he's switching wildly between male and female pronouns for one and the same person in this one.

That shouldn't happen if he just machine translates from English to German.

What the fuck is he doing?
 

CalciumAnimal

Drink Milk
Joined:  Feb 24, 2023
If my questionable school German and twitter translate are to be trusted, he's switching wildly between male and female pronouns for one and the same person in this one.

That shouldn't happen if he just machine translates from English to German.

What the fuck is he doing?
probably one of those English to language sites because hes too retarded to realize even google will translate it better.
 

Fucking YTs

I just want to annoy people in peace.
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 11, 2022

RestlessRain

Well-known member
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 21, 2022
It looks like we have enough Crush reacts to make a really disjointed and autistic story out of this shit. Which is cool, because that's how Nolan writes.


:crushrepliedtoyou:
:nolancries:
:crushracist:
:crushGettingWorse:
:crushretardedawfulbrother:
:crushcriesalot:
:crushautistic:
:crushsighs:
:nolanNormal:
:ohnosighs:
:crushface:
 

reinigen

Dang it
Ward Security
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
Nolan once again can't control his fucking diabetes and doesn't take out his dogs for SIXTEEN FUCKING HOURS.
image.png


4chan would be logging anonymous complaints to local animal control for this shit, I swear to fucking god.

Edit: This just in! Nolan Crush has been banned from yet another discord! This time he
>checks notes
got banned from the Dokibird server for posting about the ELIRA PENDORA COMEBACK STREAM.


image.png

image.png
 
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Topo Chico

Well-known member
Joined:  Apr 1, 2023
Nolan once again can't control his fucking diabetes and doesn't take out his dogs for SIXTEEN FUCKING HOURS.
image.png


4chan would be logging anonymous complaints to local animal control for this shit, I swear to fucking god.
So, if that was yesterday, what did he do today?

Simp for (coom over) a woman who insists on using he/him pronouns

Ape black vernacular

Stim all day in preparation for Gura's quarterly stream

Can guarantee he neglected the dogs today based on that activity.
" ... my issue with dad block PC ... " makes no sense. He's pure vent-posting with zero editing. It reads as feigning remorse. The bulk of this first paragraph of venting is a continued common complaint against his father, opening with his admitting his mistake and that the punishment doesn't fit the crime. The issue (one of many) is with the first in his list is the premise that a) his bed time is an issue and b) blocking the computer doesn't affect his bed time. However, he is correct, just not in the way he had hoped; his dad needs to take his phone and block Internet access to his Chromebook. Point two is Nolan intentionally missing his dad's point, four hours goes into 16 four times. The nap is merely one visible aspect of his failing to do his very basic chore(s) that is easily highlightable as it reinforces his father's arguement about his lack of sleep schedule due to his Internet addiction/parasocial relationships with vtubers. Point three is the start of the blame shifting he talks about at the end.

The usage of the phrase "I hope things improve" detaches/distances himself from the situation he caused. He knows he caused it, he came up with a shit excuse (can't read translation on phone) for why he did what he did. He can't even convince himself that it was okay to go against his father's wishes. His narcissism that the mistake was in not checking on his phone first and not that this cycle of behavior needs to end because it causes problems is pure delusion. It also implies that if he couldn't have read the subtitles on his phone he'd have used his mother's computer anyway. Gross. Finally, telling your dad that lock meant to keep you out was too easy to break into is inherently victim blaming. Fuck 5x the work, 20x, 100x for breech of privacy and because he doesn't do any work. 100 x 0 = 0.

This is all classic Nolan.

I wish they'd rehome those dogs. They didn't do shit to deserve this level of disfunction.
 

Fucking YTs

I just want to annoy people in peace.
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 11, 2022
got banned from the Dokibird server for posting about the ELIRA PENDORA COMEBACK STREAM.
Chad Nolan.jpeg
Ahh, AI horrors beyond my comprehension.
 

Abomination

The abominable amalgamation known as "chyaaat!"
Joined:  Apr 1, 2023
Retard is really pulling an :Fauna-AKSHUALLY: because his Dad is supposedly wrong about the reason his useless ass didn't take the dogs outside for 16 hours.

And in his attempt to use his Mom's PC to circumvent his blocked PC access, he somehow fucks up her PC and is concerned about the possibility of doing 5x the amount of work it takes to try and fix it because it might impact him for more than one day.

It never fails to astound me at how useless he is.
:pippabrogoblin:
 

fortnitesmasherX

Well-known member
Joined:  Apr 14, 2023
Is it wrong to say that I really want to see what he'd type if he was beaten?
 

BlueSharkTV

Fucking Riggers
Early Adopter
Yuria's Husband
Joined:  Sep 10, 2022

God's Strongest Dragoon

Well-known member
Joined:  Mar 20, 2023
It genuinely amazes me how much of a burden he is on those around him and how his narcissism doesn't permit him to ever acknowledge this because he refuses to accept responsibility for his actions. He is the albatross tied around the neck of his family as punishment for not committing him to a mental institution.
 

Koronesuki

X-Potato
Joined:  Oct 1, 2023
I wish they'd rehome those dogs. They didn't do shit to deserve this level of disfunction.
He shouldn't be allowed to take care of dogs. His parents shouldn't be allowed to put him in charge of caring for the dogs.
 

Nenélove

I am coming for you
Early Adopter
Nene's Pet Latinx
Latinx/Latine
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
Wtf is this conversation? The Tero guy was getting somewhere asking Nolan wtf he's venting for but then he starts backing off like he's the one in the wrong, bloody hell. If I was in this discord (I wouldn't be because discord is for fags and any discord with A VENT CHANNEL is for even bigger queers) I'd probably tell him to stop his retarded crying and moaning.

This motherfucker pisses me off, he really does represent everything wrong with modern internet culture, just like Chris was the embodiment of the trashiness of the culture of the late 90s and 2000s.

  1. Openly degenerate
  2. Offended by bullshit
  3. Overly emotional
  4. Easily baited into chimping out
  5. No fucking OPSEC
  6. Begs for attention
  7. Learns nothing from his mistakes
  8. Argues with people about nothing
  9. Victimizes self
  10. Has random outbursts apropos of nothing
  11. Obsessed with how others view him
  12. Eternal FOMO
  13. Has rampant unmedicated mental issues
  14. Blames others for all of his bad choices
  15. Overshares shit which should be kept private
  16. Sense of humor of a grade schooler
  17. Has nothing interesting to say
  18. Braindead, uninformed takes
  19. Surrounds self with yes men and bad influences
  20. Uses the internet to hide from shitty real life
This crap may seem like things Nolan does because he's an autist or just a maladjusted retard, but the real SCARY shit is when you realize that ALL OF THESE THINGS are SUPER FUCKING COMMON online right now and all of you know people who do 5 or more of them, at the end of the day Nolan isn't particularly special. Is everyone insane now? Are 90% of people not that much better than a literal autistic? Fuck this gay earth...
 
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