If you were having too happy of a night and would like to instantly ruin it, come read Shondo's account of her mother's funeral

it was very very hard at first, i was shaking so bad
she looked beautiful though, at peace, they did such a lovely job. she looked like she was sleeping. the coffin is white and very pretty.
i cant tell you how tiny she looked laying there though. she looked like a child.
i expected her to be cold but it was more than i thought.
i still dont think its really sank in at all.
thank you everyone for all of the love though, we’re gonna go sit with her again on her birthday on monday. i am glad that i went today, even if it was really hard.
i do think now that saying goodbye to her for the last visit migjt be harder than the funeral
i’m dreading that the most now, i think
one day at a time
it sounds silly, but i keep telling myself that if i can make it through this, then anyone can. aside from sticking with my family and taking care of them, i am thinking so much that i have to do it so that i can prove to you guys no matter what happens, no matter how bad it gets, it must, it has to get better
i believe in the you that believes in me that believes in you or something
yeah
