Hi!
I want to take a moment to address some of the things said here. First and foremost, I have never minimized or invalidated anyone's support - I am and always will be incredibly grateful for it. However, as many of you have pointed out, there are also things that I am *NOT* allowed to discuss or in position to do so myself.
The silence isn't always a personal choice. Sometimes it's necessary for many reasons - whether it be due to privacy, personal well-being, or other internal processes that it has to go through. I have always shared what I felt comfortable sharing with you guys, but I also ask for some understanding when I choose to keep aspects of my personal live and time private.
Over the past few months, I have been balancing many responsibilities. This includes school, ongoing health issues that require medical attention (I try not to bring them up anymore in fear that it's just being used against me), and personal matters such as family losses or events. I know my absence/presence on social media during my hiatus was extremely frustrating for some, but there were many factors that had to be considered, even internally, that made communication very difficult.
This along with some other internal issues (at the time) took a significant toll on my mental health, to the point where I had considered stepping away entirely. The harassment and doxxing I received, both then and even until now, only made things harder to come back to. Doing this on my personal accounts that have no relation to streaming only made things worse. It is sad to say, but it still persists from time to time to this day.
Since my return, I've been streaming more consistently. My stream hours have remained the same as it has been for my time in idol (typically 1-2 hours). I understand some of you still have unanswered questions or concerns, and I truly have been pushing as hard as I can behind closed doors to get more clarity for everyone. However, these things take time and require approvals beyond just me. And in all honesty, I am also quite tanked and have just been letting everything slide under the rug because I've lost the energy to fight back.
Also please do not attack or harass my friends or those who have been speaking up for me in any way. They have been nothing but kind and supportive of me when I felt wronged or unheard.
While I never expect support from anyone, I do ask for some kindness and respect. If seeing me on your feed upsets you in any way, please feel free to block or mute me - I completely understand! At the end of the day, I am also just another silly person online trying to do something they enjoy while juggling life. Thank you for taking the time to read this till the end & I hope you have a lovely day
