The Nolan Crush Memorial Post Dump and Lolcow Thread

[Sky Shouter]

Anyone want to do some quick digging that who is alviniscute?
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I guess someone that replies ro Nolan makes the most senses, but Nolan decided to be Nolan

Edit: After reread his whole fucking storiesI guess Nolan deserved to get hanged for what he did to his brother

@Fucking YTs I think this Nolan's quote deserved to add into random.txt or stickers .......

"What I did in response to this is what I normally do when he bullies me, I took the Wally's diaper and I wiped his penis on it, then wiped it against multiple things of my brother's (razor, floss, toothbrush). Then I noticed before my shower that he wasn't in his room so I wiped it on couple thinfs there too (glass mug and mouse)"

Based on a casual read Nolan's sibling basically called him out for staying up all night again, so Nolan retaliated by committing biological warfare against them.

Ronald Reagan, I will never forgive you for closing the loony bins.

 

[reinigen]

I'm at work and can't really talk, but this might be good enough to earn Nolan a real KF thread. This is the kind of event I've been waiting for.


Edit - to be safe, Archived this shit from the Pony site. https://archive.is/dcA47

 

[Sankisei]

At Page 175 Nolan Crush stopped being a Character exclusive to the Virtual Asylum to make his debut in a bigger publisher

 

[John Vtuber👁️]

>"What I did in response to this is what I normally do when he bullies me[...]"

...wait, is the implication that he often rubs dog pee on his brother's/family's personal affects? and that he did it to his own personal items "as a joke"?

how many times did that have to happen before it was rationalized as "[HE] didn't do anything wrong"

 

[Topo Chico]

>"What I did in response to this is what I normally do when he bullies me[...]"

...wait, is the implication that he often rubs dog pee on his brother's/family's personal affects? and that he did it to his own personal items "as a joke"?

how many times did that have to happen before it was rationalized as "[HE] didn't do anything wrong"

The implication is he rubs dog penis on something that he then rubs on items. And how do you rub dog dick on something? Well you gotta touch some dog dick, which he "normally" does when bullied. He claims he's bullied a lot. That's a lot of dog dick handlin'.

 

[John Vtuber👁️]

The implication is he rubs dog penis on something that he then rubs on items. And how do you rub dog dick on something? Well you gotta touch some dog dick, which he "normally" does when bullied. He claims he's bullied a lot. That's a lot of dog dick handlin'.

...so, follow up question, does he consider rubbing off his dog as a normal activity?

 

[Topo Chico]

...so, follow up question, does he consider rubbing off his dog as a normal activity?

Well he thinks he didn't do anything wrong...

 

[RestlessRain]

I'm at work and can't really talk, but this might be good enough to earn Nolan a real KF thread. This is the kind of event I've been waiting for.

 

[God's Strongest Dragoon]

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[Hff201]

So now he has both the B and the Z from the infamous ever-growing acronym?

Thanks for picking up where Henri left off, I guess.

 

[Topo Chico]

To absolutely steel man Nolan for a moment:
He has, in the past, said he uses text-to-speech to compose his omega long essays. He a) has a mush mouth b) has autism and c) may be presently crying as he tries to get Google to understand his ramblings. These compounding variables could indicate that he doesn't actually rub up on that dog dick, but the text-to-speech had an issue, or he flubbed his wording.
Based on prior readings of his essays, both extracurricular and for school, he doesn't proof read shit. I sincerely hope, and will cope that, he "only" took off the doggy diaper which wiped the dog dick/piss and ctrl c ctrl v the biospam that shit onto his brothers belongings.

 

[Abomination]

One day, this retard will murder his remaining family members in their sleep in a fit of tard rage and then cry in the court room that the judge and prosecutor are egomaniacs for not giving a shit about his excuse of them interrupting a livestream he was watching or whatever. He'll probably also ask his attorney for hugs.

Hopefully, through some weird and almost impossible divine intervention as to entertain God and the rest of us, that attorney will be Rackets.

 

[God's Strongest Dragoon]

One day, this retard will murder his remaining family members in their sleep in a fit of tard rage and then cry in the court room that the judge and prosecutor are egomaniacs for not giving a shit about his excuse of them interrupting a livestream he was watching or whatever. He'll probably also ask his attorney for hugs.

Hopefully, through some weird and almost impossible divine intervention as to entertain God and the rest of us, that attorney will be Rackets.

His dad is going to take away his computer/internet when Gura eventually does a graduation stream and Nolan is going to murder him in his sleep.

 

[BlueSharkTV]

you know, maybe AI isn't bad after all.

 

[NeneHATE]

you know, maybe AI isn't bad after all.

He doesn't have Nolan's swollen ass lips though.

 

[PassiveUnaggressive]

Snip

Absolutely disgusting behavior, on all fronts. I don't care what his brother supposedly did. I need to revise a statement I made previously in his trial thread:

I wouldn't have Nolan over and cook him a full meal, I'd meet him at Mcdonald's and buy him a burger and soda, call it good.

I would not have Nolan over, I would not meet him at McD's. Who knows what he'd decide to do if he tard rages for no reason at all. That weird autistic vindictive streak is a no for me

 

[Zizara]

Nolan: I am being retarded for not reading the stream information and wasted my time! I demand some hugs!

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Also Nolan: Fuck Lumi Mod for banning him while he is trying to find his happiness! Lemon Woman and his Mod is EVIL!!!

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Nolan still struggling with the concept of a reputation like a lot of spergs. I hate how my mind immediately went to him when Geega was talking about it.

You have to be phone verified to watch a stream now?

It's a Twitch feature streamers can activate. They can restrict their chat to email-verified accounts only, phone-verified, or both. It's to stop bots but honestly it's really annoying, I'm not giving them my phone number just so my message can get lost in whatever emote some 12 year old is currently spamming.

To absolutely steel man Nolan for a moment:
He has, in the past, said he uses text-to-speech to compose his omega long essays. He a) has a mush mouth b) has autism and c) may be presently crying as he tries to get Google to understand his ramblings. These compounding variables could indicate that he doesn't actually rub up on that dog dick, but the text-to-speech had an issue, or he flubbed his wording.
Based on prior readings of his essays, both extracurricular and for school, he doesn't proof read shit. I sincerely hope, and will cope that, he "only" took off the doggy diaper which wiped the dog dick/piss and ctrl c ctrl v the biospam that shit onto his brothers belongings.

On the other hand Nolan will escalate to violence at the slightest and even imagined provocation if he thinks you're a weak target. He's also the sort of person to eat ice cream with his bare hands, and isn't that an even more horrifying thing to consider with the context of where his hands could have been?
Jacking off a dog for revenge because he knows wiping it on stuff is humiliating for the target, but not understanding enough to realise how admitting to doing it makes him look, is entirely within the low cunning of the retarded.

 

[Latte'Ninba]

Even for Nolan that's.. something. How the fuck do you even come up with that? "I was mad at someone for calling me out so I took our dog's diaper off, rubbed it against his dick, then rubbed it on some stuff of the people angering me." Even typing that makes me regret eating recently. And how do you think that anyone would defend that? That's the type of shit you expect to show in up a court case between former roomates that ended with a stabbing.

"I don't think I did anything wrong but didn't want to admit to it because I would get attacked for it" My guy you're lucky they're not attacking you with fists for all your bullshit. Which is UNIRONICALLY something you've done to at least one person there. Your "drunk bitch" mother who always sides with dad. (two counting the sister) Unless I recall wrong he's never had the balls to do more than push anyone who could swing back.
"My pc was turned off and it's gonna take like 10 minutes to set up!" Nigga you're basically trying to poison people. And this is "normal" for you by your own claims. You shouldn't even have a PC but you would probably knife them all in their sleep if they took it.

"At the end of the day, I simply touched a mug and a mouse (with a dog's diaper. also by the way this is a lie because A: You said you touched more than that but B: Even if you didn't do that "this time" you admit to doing it to other shit OTHER TIMES. HOW IS THIS A COMMON THING YOU DO??) because he's an egomaniac who takes everything as a slight against him because he has no self awareness." Something something pot kettle and gamer words.

This specific reveal is really just an added layer of what the fuck. I dunno how he manages to find new lows to admit to. It's just even more fucked because he completely admits and reveals this isn't new. It's not recent. This is something he's thought out and proceeded to actually do multiple times over the course of time to his brother. AND himself because "It isn't that bad and I don't care."
Why would I not assume you've done other weird fucked up shit at this point? "I only brushed my ass with his toothbrush like 6 times. It's not that bad bro, I did it to mine too! It's just going to get cleaned by the toothpaste anyway though?" It really loops back around to me being scared to know if there's anything else to learn about his interactions with his sister. His reality is so beyond fucked it's unreal.

 

[reinigen]

I made a thing

 

[Piarro]

Yeah I'm not reading this thread anymore