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Sky Shouter

YEAH! TONIGHT!
Joined:  Sep 15, 2022
@God's Strongest Mozumite I saw this on twitter and immediately thought of you, I hope you like it

1723775254552.png
 

Euthyphro

Certified Awatistic
Joined:  Dec 22, 2023

Nenélove

I am coming for you
Early Adopter
Nene's Pet Latinx
Latinx/Latine
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
Today on Beaner How it's Made: The Chancla.

The chancla has been used since the age of the mighty Aztecs to punish criminals and misbehaving children. After the age of colonization this household footwear weapon has been consistently used by geriatric women with way too much strength for their age with tactical precision, so much so that its name alone inspires fear in the minds of Joses and Miguels everywhere. The chancla allows people to walk around showing their disgusting deformed toes while at the same time technically wearing shoes, the perfect marriage of not actually being barefoot while also getting dirt and grime on your feet anyways.

First we import some rubber harvested by starving child slaves in the Congo, idk which one but it doesn't really matter. Why is the rubber not grown and harvested in the americas by starving child slaves? because economics says fuck logic.

The rubber is then melted in a big vat with some other chemicals your neighbor is probably getting high on tonight. This helps to give it strength and elasticity, which it will need when your abuela uses it to beat the everloving shit out of your pre-teen ass.

This magical mixture is then pressed and molded into a useable version of itself, something which most latinos will never experience. Straps of the cheapest and coarsest fibers ever are added, so that it gives you blisters between your toes for no fucking reason.

The finished chanclas, now known as slippers, are then shipped off to the US to be used by fat, balding, middle-aged dads and coked up dudebros who somehow got through college. These are then imported back into the country they were made in with a fancy label and a 10x price markup, ready for your abuela to buy one in 1965 and then keep using it to physically assault generations of children...
 
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Aquatic Novellite

Freshwater Shiorin
Early Adopter
Joined:  Oct 10, 2022
Today on Beaner How it's Made: The Chancla.

The chancla has been used since the age of the mighty Aztecs to punish criminals and misbehaving children. After the age of colonization this household footwear weapon has been consistently used by geriatric women with way too much strength for their age with tactical precision, so much so that its name alone inspires fear in the minds of Joses and Miguels everywhere. The chancla allows people to walk around showing their disgusting deformed toes while at the same time technically wearing shoes, the perfect marriage of not actually being barefoot while also getting dirt and grime on your feet anyways.

First we import some rubber harvested by starving child slaves in the Congo, idk which one but it doesn't really matter. Why is the rubber not grown and harvested in the americas by starving child slaves? because economics says fuck logic.

The rubber is then melted in a big vat with some other chemicals your neighbor is probably getting high on tonight. This helps to give it strength and elasticity, which it will need when your abuela uses it to beat the everloving shit out of your pre-teen ass.

This magical mixture is then pressed and molded into a useable version of itself, something which most latinos will never experience. Straps of the cheapest and coarsest fibers ever are added, so that it gives you blisters between your toes for no fucking reason.

The finished chanclas, now known as slippers, are then shipped off to the US to be used by fat, balding, middle-aged dads and coked up dudebros who somehow got through college. These are then imported back into the country they were made in with a fancy label and a 10x price markup, ready for your abuela to buy one in 1965 and then keep using it to physically assault generations of children...
This is why open immigration is a necessity. Only by letting in millions of latinos can a perpetual conservative majority in the United States be guaranteed.
 

PleaseCheckYourReceipts

Well-known member
Joined:  May 6, 2023
@God's Strongest Mozumite I saw this on twitter and immediately thought of you, I hope you like it

View attachment 75941
This is 10x funnier than it has any right to be. But I'm cracking up so bad.

It's also one of the lesser discussed realities that a decently put together White guy can roll his way through most of Central & South America. The issue is that the Mother-in-Law's are actually dangerous. Equatorial Americans have yet to properly genetically adapt to the existence of metal blades.
 

GOD'S STRONGEST BUILDERBEAR

"Shut up, Dazzle. I will clip your balls" -SB
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 12, 2022

God's Strongest Mozumite

Mega Mozu Milkers.
Early Adopter
ENTERING FLAVOR COUNTRY
Joined:  Oct 28, 2022

Aquatic Novellite

Freshwater Shiorin
Early Adopter
Joined:  Oct 10, 2022

God's Strongest Mozumite

Mega Mozu Milkers.
Early Adopter
ENTERING FLAVOR COUNTRY
Joined:  Oct 28, 2022
That's a giant, big tittied domme cockroach to you, good sir.
Sorry, I should clarify: what's disgusting about Matara is how much I want to pin her down and USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST

B-but... She's not... Isn't she rather pale for peculiar tastes, sir?
Nah she just molted recently, she's going to get dark and rigid any day now :wataCreep:
 
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Just pretending

The Great Bald Rrat
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 10, 2022
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Aquatic Novellite

Freshwater Shiorin
Early Adopter
Joined:  Oct 10, 2022

naganon

#1 Hexa Fan
Joined:  Feb 26, 2023
What's up Yamanbas? :smugpipi:
 
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Awoogers

basic ass man who loves the british funny woman
Joined:  Jun 7, 2023
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Paladin

Resident Sad Girl Enjoyer
Joined:  Jan 5, 2023
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thhrang

Punished Autism Extraordinaire
Early Adopter
Ward Security
♥Realticule's Husbando♥
Joined:  Sep 13, 2022

Brosnan Pierce Brosnan

God's Strongest Smartass
Dizzy's Husband
Joined:  Apr 4, 2023
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Bronze

Well-known member
Joined:  Nov 2, 2023
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BlueSharkTV

Fucking Riggers
Early Adopter
Yuria's Husband
Joined:  Sep 10, 2022

naganon

#1 Hexa Fan
Joined:  Feb 26, 2023

Awoogers

basic ass man who loves the british funny woman
Joined:  Jun 7, 2023
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