I wanted to write this weeks ago, but I suddenly got busy with something
I wrote parts of this right after the con, but I still feel like this, just less strong as the daily life comes back and I am back to just watching her regular streams and having fun
FAQ:
Was it my first con?
Since becoming a Vtuber fan in 2020, yes.
Did I go with KFP?
No, I am a lurker and am too socially inept to talk to people, I got to watch from more or less far.
Did you meet Keeki?
No.
As said above, I went to a convention. Overall much too crowded for my taste, but overall I had a lot of fun mostly Walking around the artist area. I did meet some Kfp, and saw many more I recognized from twitter and/or the discord, a lot of them walk around with little Name bades, so its easy to pick up names any Kiara regular must have heard and seen in her Streams or under her Twitter.
Surprisingly the majority of them are very much regular looking folk, the actual ugly bastards are a minority. I had no direct negative interactions with any of them (not that I had any meaningful or longer interactions anyways), they were all varying grades of friendly.
Aside from buying stuff in the Artist alley and just looking at anime figures I had no intention to buy, I saw a few panels at the Vtuber stage. Its not a very big area, basically a small corner in one hall that was wholly dedicated to Vtubers/Fleshstreamers. The biggest area in there was dedicated to managing the lines of people who want an autograph or so from various VAs that were invited. In this Hall were for example a Globie Booth, several booths for Vtubers and orgs I have never heard of before, but also the Hololive Fanbooth. About 20 meters south was the official Keekihime booth. Not sure if that layout was intentional or not. Anyways, the Vtuber stage was a small stage with a video projector and seats for maybe 80 people. I watched Umi Kyokus show (ex-Ophie from Vrev) and some random collab by Globie, as well some Dutch indie and later Shouto and Doki. But this post isnt about that.
As anyone reading this far woud guess, I did watch Keekis/Kiaras little concert on the vtuber stage. It wasn't on the official programming and kinda spontaneous but she still almost drew the biggest crowd I saw that weekend. I have the feeling there were more people for Shouxto and it was on par with Dokis Panel.
And.... her little show was mid. At best. Dancing went barely beyond basic idol-steps and a turn here and there. Singing was backup for more than half of it and telling the audiende to sing some chant over and over again instead of singing herself. I left that concert mostly disappointed. I saw 2 random girls doing some dancing (not singing) to some music and their dancing looked much more interesting and complex.
I do believe the issue was that she was doing both dancing and singing at the same time and both of it suffered for it. But looking at the reactions to her performance online, no one else seems to notice it? Am I seeing something they don't? Are they seeing something I can't?? I am so incredibly confused. Every karaoke I watched of her as a vtuber has been more fun. Heck, I randomly watched Umi Kyoko, Ex-Ophelia, perform karaoke and I was cheering her on with small movements. But keekis show didn't rock me at all. Has anyone here felt the same? To vastly prefer the 2D of your oshi to the 3D? Everything I have seen of Kiara in Hololive taught me that shes good on stage, at least, most of the time its great. She didn't do anything particularly different, especially with Kiara you can tell after that she just has 1 personality and doesn't change it up. If I wasn't looking at the stage, I totally could imagine myself just watching a karaoke, it was the same voice after all. But the energy just felt off.
Edit by me a few weeks into the future: Looking back, I still think the show was very mid. My feelings about that part of the rant dont seem to have changed. Also, her Birthday Karaoke was so much fun and had me moving while listening to it while walking, so at least her Vtuber self still has that kind of infectious energy.
This goes mostly to those who have an oshi that is fairly active next to Hololive, like La+ or Azki or Matsuri. Have any of you thought less of your oshi after meeting or seeing her perform irl? Is my reaction justified? Am I being too harsh for some reason? I also wonder how all the other KFPs who were there did it. Certainly, for most of them too, this was their very first Keekihime live show, yet they all cheered as if they were life-long fans or so, fully decked out in merch they bought just the previous day at her booth. Some of them must have spent several hours in the line in front of her booth, it was seriously long. I bought expensive tickets for that whole convention, no way I will waste half a day getting 2 pieces of merch from one booth.
I knew she was going to be there at the convention. I went anyways but not because of Keeki, but for literally everything else. I actively avoided seeing her (Successfully, the only time I saw her irl was during her concert). I kind of expected it, but still I was shocked at how much the line in front of her booth was tainted orange and with Hololive merch.
After the 1st day, I saw pretty much every single notable or regular kfp posting on Twitter about how nice it was meeting her and how much of a cute person she is. Seeing those posts gave me FOMO, and felt like I wanted to meet her too. But fomo feels like the wrong reason, I never went to her booth and got Keeki merch, much less when she was there in person and doing photoshoots. I had the feeling of wanting to go see her, not because I sincerely believe I am a fan and supporter of keeki, but because others gas her up so much. Franky speaking, I know nothing of Keeki, I never listend to any of Keekis songs, I don't care about Cosplay to buy the photos of a girl in a costume (much less put them on my wall), I have never watched a Keeki stream, before or after she became Kiara. And so, going to her booth and shaking her hand, when I know zilch about her, felt dishonest to me.
And yet, even weeks later, I am still not sure if that was the right move or not.
I guess I have to try it. Would I have dramatically less fun watching a nayuta concert compared to a Azki karaoke? Is it just an issue I have only with Keeki/Kiara or every 3D performance? At this point I don't know anymore.
But something within me wanted to enjoy it like everyone else was, but something in my head blocked me from having fun. Massive autism most likely.
Maybe I would enjoy it more if I were an actual, involved member of the community. I know from other hobbies that having a group to enjoy them with, does improve some thins massively, and as stated above, I had a few short conversations, but I am still a loner.
And well, by the second day and after her performance, my impression was even more set. Shes a washed up idol and it was obvious. Little sidenote: she said she's 28, soon 29 on stage. The wise hag years are upon us, now even more since her Birthday just happened the other day.
I fear that by simply watching this performance I have permanently broken something and I will never be able to enjoy her streams in the same was as I used to. Which is a shame, I don't want one bad performance get in the way of enjoying a streamer who has proven herself to me over and over again in those past 3 years.
Edit with hindsight: Since a few weeks have now passed since I first wrote this, I am happy to say that I this didn't come true. I still enjoy her stream lots, I still enjoy Kiaras Karaokes as well. She remains just as fun to listen to.
My impression of Keeki/Kiara changed less than the way I now look at her hardcore fans. I don't even know why, but after seeing them all wear orange the whole day, then change into the Keeki shirts for her performance, and then change back afterward, whenever I see them on twitter these days, a little voice in my head says "fucking hypocrites”. Why? What makes them more Hypocrites than, let's say La+ poster here? I can't even explain it myself. More autism it must be.
I have no conclusion to give so uhh
Thank you dear reader for checking out my blog. The next post is scheduled to be [whenever my autism flares up again]
idk why I still feel the need to post this, but it still bugs me on some level. Give me meds or a serious response, both will be funny