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The Kestraline Kronicles - Discussion Thread

Sithis

Dread Father
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
Did he at least produce more cum than Kurt's tiny little squirt?
 

Aquatic Novellite

Freshwater Shiorin
Early Adopter
Joined:  Oct 10, 2022
Does it come with cum residue on the screen?



If we're going by timeline on the cum, here's what probably happened:
> Spanner's tablet have been delivered
> Spanner is giddy with joy
> Spanner takes off his clothes (as Scots are predisposed to do when they feel giddy)
> Inspects the tablet
> While inspecting, he fantasizes about what Char will say to him (he's been a good boy)
> Ejaculates prematurely (as Scots are predisposed to do when they're aroused)
> Ejaculate went on the screen
> Panics
> Went to the cupboard to get a wipe
> Inadvertently smears his cum all over the tablet
> PANICS
> Thought about sending Char a message about what happened
> Sonic The Hedgehog© movie plays on the telly
> He got distracted because SONIC
> Fell asleep after watching the movie
> Woke up the next day and saw the mess
> Figures it won't matter much because it's an expensive table
> Puts the tablet back in the box and starts packing it
> Mails the box
> Goes home and fantasizes about Char's expression on the tablet (he's been a gooder boy)
> Watches JonTron plays Sonic 2©
> Posts on the forum
> Goes to sleep fulfilled

I'm drunk AF. Please ignore this post.

Snapper... LOL. LMAO even.
Canon.
 

furaibou

鼻血が出るほどいい
Joined:  Dec 30, 2022
Jesus Tap-dancing Christ, did we REALLY NEED to read you fucking autistic bell-ends analyze the "ifs" and "buts" of man batter on a screen?

:tenmakys:
 

Nigel Nigerman

Choo Choo Motherfuckers!
Joined:  Dec 22, 2022
Jesus Tap-dancing Christ, did we REALLY NEED to read you fucking autistic bell-ends analyze the "ifs" and "buts" of man batter on a screen?

:tenmakys:
:deztheroom: YES. :deztheroom:
 

Murrayしないで

Just go live!
Joined:  Nov 18, 2022
Jesus Tap-dancing Christ, did we REALLY NEED to read you fucking autistic bell-ends analyze the "ifs" and "buts" of man batter on a screen?

:tenmakys:

Yes, because it elevates this whole thing from just autistic harassment to something that Spanner might have to go on a list for (I assume the UK has sex offender registries too). From a restraining order to possible prison time. It's a very serious claim, and at this moment there's effectively no evidence for it - though if she still has the tablet I suppose there could be. It's also the sort of thing where, if it is disproven or even just not proven, it gives Spanner ammo to cast the rest of the post into doubt. It probably should not have been included in the OP unless there is more substantial evidence than what we have now.
 

Johnny Jambalaya

99%
Early Adopter
Ward Security
Joined:  Sep 15, 2022
Did he at least produce more cum than Kurt's tiny little squirt?
I totally forgot about that guy until I read this and it all came rushing back like a bad nightmare.
 

Nenélove

I am coming for you
Early Adopter
Nene's Pet Latinx
Latinx/Latine
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
Did he at least produce more cum than Kurt's tiny little squirt?
This place turns more Homosexual by the day JFC. WHY ARE WE ANALYZING THE EJACULATION QUALITIES OF SOME DUDE?!?!?
 

Sithis

Dread Father
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
This place turns more Homosexual by the day JFC. WHY ARE WE ANALYZING THE EJACULATION QUALITIES OF SOME DUDE?!?!?
Idk isn't that how vtubers determine which simp to eventually marry? They measure the amount of splooge on the tributes they receive? I mean that's what /vt/ led me to believe...

Maybe that's why Katta chose the Jew.
 

Brosnan Pierce Brosnan

God's Strongest Smartass
Dizzy's Husband
Joined:  Apr 4, 2023
Idk isn't that how vtubers determine which simp to eventually marry? They measure the amount of splooge on the tributes they receive? I mean that's what /vt/ led me to believe...

Maybe that's why Katta chose the Jew.
Inb4 ""As a content creator it's ok to cheat on your husband and give back to the community. It is the mark of a healthy relationship" - Leah Silverberg
 

reinigen

Dang it
Ward Security
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
Wait, what? June 30th was the date with the picture of the tablet and the "Oh man, thank you for the tablet" conversation, so he had the tablet then (long before July 27th). And then she kept talking to him about it, and while she does seem hesitant in the September conversation, she still appears to consent to having it sent to her in that conversation. (it looks like he has been editing the google doc per his own notes, so maybe the order of some stuff has switched around, but I'm looking at the dates of the conversations in the images rather than the order they appear in the doc, and June 30th is before July 27th on most calendars)
Listen you contrarian foot fetishist, you're just proving more and more you didn't read the actual document. He offered her the tablet on June 30th which she initially accepted. After he purchased it, (second hand, seemingly from Japan) it got lost in the mail for months. BETWEEN when he offered, and when he actually received it, she told him "You know what, never fucking mind. You've proven yourself to be a creep, fuck off and keep the tablet".

Come back when you've actually read and processed everything and aren't going to "yea but" about something you're blatantly wrong about for a 3rd time.
 

Aquatic Novellite

Freshwater Shiorin
Early Adopter
Joined:  Oct 10, 2022
Idk isn't that how vtubers determine which simp to eventually marry? They measure the amount of splooge on the tributes they receive? I mean that's what /vt/ led me to believe...

Maybe that's why Katta chose the Jew.
A part of me wants to keep escalating the joke, but another, more boring but probably wiser, part of myself tells me that it's time to stop. We should not keep going and we should not learn what happens if we do.
 

Aka Split

Well-known member
IRyS's husband
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 11, 2022
Listen you contrarian foot fetishist, you're just proving more and more you didn't read the actual document. He offered her the tablet on June 30th which she initially accepted. After he purchased it, (second hand, seemingly from Japan) it got lost in the mail for months. BETWEEN when he offered, and when he actually received it, she told him "You know what, never fucking mind. You've proven yourself to be a creep, fuck off and keep the tablet".

Come back when you've actually read and processed everything and aren't going to "yea but" about something you're blatantly wrong about for a 3rd time.
He sent her a pic of the tablet on June 30th with something about ‘Char’ written on it. Also according to him, the tablet was never lost in transit (much less when it was sent to him from the eBay seller), it was the merch box and letters and stuff that got lost and found.
28-DA3817-75-F0-4-D1-D-A72-A-7369-E23-AE186.png


You guys self admitted that she wasn’t sure on the timeline of things, something about zoomer brain, and he’s got pics with dates on them:
FYI, at some point I will update the OP to include some of Spanner's details. This timeline was put together primarily with the aid of an ADHD zoomer with zoomer friends, so their placement on things was always on the 'uhm around that time i guess' scale. Ironically the one thing Spanner is better at than them is on self-reporting, categorizing and documenting his own insanity.

Maybe question your source a little better, because it sounds like you’re being fed lies and are being pretty gullible in believing them. Oh yeah, and I’m not a foot fetishist either.
 
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The Proctor

Manager Arc Unlocked?
Staff member
Lovebug Proctologist
Joined:  Sep 9, 2022

Awoogers

basic ass man who loves the british funny woman
Joined:  Jun 7, 2023

The Proctor

Manager Arc Unlocked?
Staff member
Lovebug Proctologist
Joined:  Sep 9, 2022

Aka Split

Well-known member
IRyS's husband
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 11, 2022
So this is admitting that you're wrong I guess, because you're rehashing a completely unrelated (and retarded) argument about a troll instead of addressing the points.
Actually you know what, it is pretty related. Because then, the same as now, I was skeptical of outrageous claims being made, and looked into the claims in order to confirm or refute them.

Edit: but actual question about the joke post you edited, I think what happened is I pasted, realized 'whoops, that's the image, not the link:, then deleted it and posted the link. So does that initial paste count against the cap even though it was deleted and not posted?
 
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Brosnan Pierce Brosnan

God's Strongest Smartass
Dizzy's Husband
Joined:  Apr 4, 2023
So this is admitting that you're wrong I guess, because you're rehashing a completely unrelated argument about a troll instead of addressing the points.
I agree with your scrutiny however as I feel that is important. You would do better though not to take the feet thing personally.
 

John Vtuber👁️

Sentient Eyeball, Primarch of Hag Pride Worldwide
Certified Manwhore
Joined:  Oct 24, 2022
The tablet has sown more division among us than anything this past week

I, for one, am terrified of what these next few weeks have in store for us, and how this story will evolve
 

Nenélove

I am coming for you
Early Adopter
Nene's Pet Latinx
Latinx/Latine
Joined:  Sep 16, 2022
The Schrodinger's tablet cum doesn't change the fact that this dude is a schizo creep and even the sonic fuckers said so too, this isn't just chink woman brewing up rrats to ruin some rando's life. This whole fucking drama started because spanner just HAD to go and act like a fucking lunatic in the discord and try to get proctor on his side over his stupid fucking tablet (aka to bash charlotte on proctor's stream), charlotte herself seems to want nothing to do with this crap and has not been desperately going up to anyone who will listen to beg for attention, she was contacted for info, not the other way around.
 

Hotdogs Aplenty

King Shiori Poster & Watcher
Early Adopter
Joined:  Sep 10, 2022
I heard he loaded pictures of Calli's feet onto the tablet.
 
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